Love & Basketball’s Monica Wright Deserved Better
As a wife and working mom, I have new feelings about this
“Double or nothing.”
That has been my favorite line from my favorite movie for the past 20 years. I cannot believe it has been that long since we were graced with the creative genius that is “Love & Basketball.”
Anyone who knows me knows that I LOVE this movie. What young basketball player was not obsessed with this movie back in 2000? Everyone was, but that’s not what I’m here to discuss.
I have watched “Love & Basketball” 50-leven times and know all of my lines, but watching it recently as a 30-something-year-old wife and mother holding it down in the middle of a pandemic was a different experience. It hit differently this time.
So much so that I immediately texted some of my mom friends to vent and check to make sure I wasn’t the only one upset about how the movie played out and how much Monica endured, lost, put up with and sacrificed to be with the man she loved. Now here I am days later, still passionate and moved to explain to you why I wholeheartedly believe that Monica Wright deserved better than Quincy McCall.
Bear with me, y’all. I know these are fictional characters, but the mess that Monica puts up with is very real, and I’ve seen it play out far too many times. I know we are all grown and can make choices about what we put up with in a relationship, but that didn’t make it any easier for me to watch Quincy drag Monica’s heart through the dirt. Yes, I’m in my feelings. Now, let’s carry on…
Quincy forced Monica to choose between him and her dreams.
I understand that love and convenience don’t always jive together. I understand the sacrifice that couples make together. Keyword: together. If one side is always giving and the other is always taking, that is not a relationship.
We saw that play out when Quincy found out that his father was not only cheating on his mother, but the father lied to his face. Quincy was hurting and wanted Monica to skip team curfew, putting her dreams in jeopardy, to be there for him. For those who know the movie, apologies for rehashing what you already know. But for those who aren’t familiar, Monica is a ball player. Playing college basketball — and then professionally — had been her dream since at least the age of 11. She also deeply loved Quincy.
She wanted to be there for him, and she was, but not in the way that he wanted at that time. Why couldn’t Quincy take Monica up on the offer and talk things out in her dorm room? I get that he didn’t want to run into anyone, but he declined the offer and Monica returned to her room to meet curfew.
He held a grudge against her for YEARS! Their relationship was never the same after this incident. He quickly found another fling but claimed it was a cheap date because he only took her to Burger King. He was so in his feelings that he couldn’t even congratulate his girl on getting a starting spot.
I do not think Quincy is a bad person, I just think he had unresolved personal issues. Those unresolved issues seeped into the relationship.
When two loving people are in a relationship, they look to give the advantage and be supportive. Quincy put a lot of expectations on his girlfriend, not wife, but girlfriend, without considering her feelings and her sacrifices. My message to the Quincys of the world: Love does not seek its own way. That’s bible!
My message to the Monicas of the world: Heed the warning signs. I know the heart wants what the heart wants, but sometimes those wants are not coming from your heart at all. Really stop and ask yourself questions. If this person never changes, could I see myself spending forever with them? Do not throw your heart and emotions into a lifelong project that will only leave you broken. It’s easier said than done, but your older self will thank you.
Throughout the movie, we constantly saw Monica wrestle with the desires to be completely sold out to Quincy and her dream. But why did she have to choose? I will leave it there, or risk writing a dissertation to answer this question.
She had to play for his heart.
“Had” might be a strong word here. As my mom put it, she chose to play him for his heart.
As I mentioned earlier, the one-on-one scene was one of my favorite parts in the movie. There is a lot that happened leading up to this scene, but I have to fast forward to the end. This scene in the movie is what sparked this article.
It seemed the only way for Quincy to realize that he “loved” Monica was for her to play him for his heart. Pause. You know she had been wrestling with this deeply-rooted affection for Quincy for years. She couldn’t shake it when she went overseas to play ball, and seeing him with his fiance was the final straw. Even Monica’s mom felt that Quincy could do better. By better, she meant Monica. That was the fuel and confirmation she needed to go after her guy.
We got a glimpse of Quincy’s buried affections for Monica when he stopped her outside of her parents’ house. She traded in her Nikes for a pair of shoes she couldn’t walk in, and she was working at the bank. They both questioned why the other stopped playing ball, and they both agreed it wasn’t the same. That’s code for they missed each other. It wasn’t the same because they weren’t together. But WHY couldn’t he say that? Why? Why?
When Monica finally professes her love to Quincy before the iconic one-on-one scene, he flat out drags her through the mud. He yells at her for dropping this bombshell on him two weeks before he is about to get married.
This is yet another red flag, and by now we all should have known that Monica deserved better. For him to insinuate that he did not know she loved him was a slap in the face. It seemed the only way for him to even consider taking her back was after she played him for his heart.
Y’all his eyes were SO cold the entire time. If you do not remember, please go back and watch. Yet, she still wanted him. Monica, Monica, Monica. I have empathy for her. I have empathy for him — to an extent. They had history together, and she cared about him.
For us “Love & Basketball” fans, we know how the story ends. He beats her and watches her cry her way off the court. But then he comes to his senses and utters what used to be my favorite line: “Double or nothing.”
She got her man in the end, but it cost her a lot.
Do you agree? Or maybe you have different views. I’d love to hear all about it in the comments section below. I’ll note that “Love & Basketball” is still my favorite movie, despite all these newfound emotions I have about Quincy and Monica.
